Can you tell me why...

...toy makers put two volume settings on toys that make noise? Normal and slightly louder. Do parents really need to turn the volume up louder on the offending, catchy, annoying tune a toy or fridge magnet plays? And is the volume increase there to help children who can't hear well? The switch just becomes a point of contention between parents and toddlers once they figure out how to turn the switch to the highest setting.

...you get shocked to death when you take your child(ren) to the local playground? When my kids come down the slide and I see their hair standing up straight, I know I'm in for it. I brace myself and take the shock for the team so my child doesn't bail off the slide and end up crying. And even then, I think I still get shocked.

...children eat crayons? Are they really that much more tasty than carrots?

...dino bites? Okay, so I don't want to offend anyone here. My kids have eaten these, my friends buy these, but why a dino? Is this a gender neutral animal? Why not a chicken b/c it's chicken? or a horse? And don't most parents cut them up resulting in the child missing out on the cute little dino anyway? There is something that totally creeps me out about shaping chicken into the shape of a dino.

...when your children wake between 5:45 am and 7 am it often throws off the entire day? And if the early waker makes it to 5:45 am you wake up slightly nauseous and can't think of anything besides when you could possibly squeeze in a nap. This early wake up also means you get to watch all those Disney shows that drive you crazy, i.e. the Wiggles and Jo Jo's circus.

...children playing so sweetly together often results in crying or yelling between them 15 minutes later? And the fact that they played sweetly for 15 minutes, is a huge success?

...it's June, 50 degrees, and my heat is coming on at the same rate it did in March? I've been eager to get some walks in with the kids, but I feel like i need to bundle them up in fleece before we venture out. Where is the sun?

These are just some questions milling about my head. I know there are no answers, but sometimes I really wish there was a wikipedia for moms.