Never easier

I am currently in the midst of Lily's 5th asthma attack since June. I have to say, it doesn't get any easier. We've been on medicine, increased doses, worked on action plans to head this off before it starts and without fail, we are still at the same place we were in June.

My doctor is great and I have a wonderful pediatrician friend who has adopted us and is more than happy to help a fellow mom in need. But it doesn't take away my mom fears. I'm still freaked out she's going to stop breathing at any moment and feel stressed just watching her breathe.

I know this will pass and soon she will grow out of it, but it doesn't make any cold easier. And I can't stop my life this winter. I want to go to church, attend my bible study and go over to play dates. In times where things are okay, I am hopeful that the next cold will be minor or that we can make it longer than 4 weeks between colds.

This is not anywhere near catastrophic. It's just 48 hours of anxiety and waiting to see if the medicine is going to work or if we need to go to urgent care. I'm hoping 48 hours from now, she'll be bouncing off the walls again, and that it's not from the steroids she's on.